I still am amazed by our team’s ability to transport us from one corner of the earth to another in such a short amount of time. Some times, we travel thousands of miles in a matter of seconds. Dare I say, it’s the fifteenth wonder of the world.

As is usual in our exploits, most people are initially receptive to FRANCH. They want to learn more about teh p0w3r of teh w3bk4m. They want to become part of history. They dream of becoming celebrities like us. They imagine all the ghey golf parties with the multiple whores passed out on the floor, each with a half-filled bottle of nectar in one hand, the finest mageia power still under their nose, and bills and bills of cyber cash somewhere in their bras. Who wouldn’t want to experience that, what we experience each and every time we go ghey golfing?

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For those fearing we lost our FRANCH in the past week, fear not. We were–and hopefully you were to–observing a moment of silence for all of the FRANCHWOMENSES killed in the Union Carbide asplosion in Bhopal. Now that we have mourned appropriately, we can now begin to post again. Don’t blink or you might miss it.

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Suprisingly, nobody ever seems to blink an eye or ask us about any of our many ‘home towns’. Which is a crying shame as we are full of useless information regarding things such as these. For instance, in Bhopal, On December 3, 1984, a Union Carbide plant in Bhopal leaked 40 tons of toxic methyl isocyanate gas, KILLING ALL FRANCHWOMANS within a 200 mile radius. This is why the official language of Central India is not FRANCH, but actually Jamaican.

Hey, all you have to do IS ASK!!`1

Because sometimes you JUST DON’T KNOW, there are FRANCHswers to be had. You might feel these are nonsensical, but someday they will come back to you and you will have an OPRAH-like moment and be like “AHAAAA NOW I KNOW WTF I AM MEANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH LAUNDRY!!”